lost

abandon

I know acutely the experience

of leaving my heart unguarded for too long

and suddenly recalling the necessity.

If I have my wits I am a professional

and I can see your kind coming through your masks and your siren dances

but the wind had changed and I thought I was in shallow water.

Do all drowning men feel as foolish?

I should know better.

I should have known better.

This man is cragged and far too rotten for change

and sunlight only speeds up decay.

Study that line.

I accept its truth, it is your sickness not to.

It is your optimist innocence that allows you to believe that you could change me.

It is my self proclaimed curse not to change.

I suppose we both could have been a little more honest.

One Man’s Life